Mastermind

If only… 如果。。。

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[see Chinese translation below 中文翻譯於下]

After an emotional breakdown, this is what I feel:

If only I can be prettier and more lovable…

If only I can be cleverer and less annoying…

If only I can be physically stronger…

If only I can be mentally stronger…

If only I can move on…

If only I can be a better person to all in general…

If only I am not a mentally sick person…

If only I am not crazy…

Yet only, I only sense my tears dripping like rain drops drip from a roof.

To put myself back together in not easy, I am sorry.

I express my apology to all those who have come to know me in their lives, I am sorry.

P.S. Lala will stop writing for a while.

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在情緒失控後,這是我的感受:

如果我能更漂亮和更惹人愛…

如果我能更聰明和更討人喜歡…

如果我能夠身體更強壯…

如果我能在精神上更強大…

如果我能放下過去向前看……

如果我能在所有一般生活裏面成為一個更好的人…

如果我不是一個精神病人…

如果我不是瘋的…

然而,我只有感覺到我滴下來的眼淚如雨般從屋頂滴下來。

要將自己回復正常不容易,我很抱歉。

我對所有那些曾經在他們的生活中認識過我的人感到很遺憾,很抱歉。

附:Lala 將會停止寫作一段時間。

 

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